Sunday 15 May 2011

AFRICAN CAR PARK SHARK!

FADE-IN:
HEATHROW AIRPORT CARPARK. 10:35AM.(Same day).

History dictates that all in-coming flights from Jamaica are always Late. Why? Some say it’s to mess with the drug-mules metabolic clock, others say “Jamaicans are so laid back they don’t give a damn about time, so why rush”. My notion is simple, the uprising of the MAROONS (Rebellious Jamaican Slaves) which eventually forced the English Government into signing a peace treaty in 1738.  Basically the British Government still hold a grudge against the manner in which they got a bloody good hiding from Cujoe & Nanny (Maroon heros).
Let's not dwell on the past Citizens of Chocko-Blocko, no let's find out what's about to happen in todays Blog Opera, at the Airport carpark. Why do some African's considers the occupation of being a Traffic Warden a 'licence to kill?' Read on and enjoy, please feel free to comment.

CUT TO:

HEATHROW AIRPORT CARPARK. 10:40AM.

Female African Parking Attendant.
“I hope you have your correct ticket”?

ME.
“Excuse me”?

Female African Parking Attendant.
“Are you deaf”?

ME.
“No”.

Female African Parking Attendant.
“Then make sure you don’t try and con di system, you Jamaican people are always trying to upset the statuesque”. Now move along before I give you a ticket for answering me back”.

Yes it’s true, no matter what you may have read about Bob Marley or Marcus Garvey, Africans and Jamaicans generally hate each others guts.

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